Tuesday Newsday – Jasmine Fiore’s family begins healing

About a month ago, I watched a movie called “Reservation Road“, starring Joaquin Phoenix and Mark Ruffalo.  It’s the story of how two fathers deal with the accidental death of the one’s son at the hands of the other.  I cried in several parts of the movie.  It’s tragic whenever a child dies, and it feels even more real when you imagine yourself in the shoes of that parent.

What struck me most about the movie was how I was unable to fully relate to the father who’s grief turned to rage and vengeance.  He spoke of the injustice of the fact that his son’s killer was walking the streets while he would never hold his own son again.  He believed that things would be fair and balanced again when the perpetrator was punished (killed).  I kept wondering if I could ever come close to understanding that with only a vicarious experience to go by.  While the death of my children is my greatest fear; more death does not give me a sense of justice, but just a continuance of pain.

I would recommend seeing the movie, and I don’t believe that I have spoiled it for you.  The boy’s death occurs in the opening 10 minutes, and the majority of the film is the story of the aftermath.

The reason that I mention this movie is because of the interview I saw yesterday with the mother of model Jasmine Fiore.  If you have not followed the story, Jasmine and her ex-husband’s rocky relationship ended with her body being found in a trunk, with her fingers cut off and her teeth pulled out, to prevent the identification of her body.  Jasmine’s body was eventually identified by the serial number on her breast implants.  Her ex-husband, Ryan Jenkins had disappeared and become the primary suspect.  The story became more popular nationally because of the murder suspect’s recent appearance on a VH1 reality show.  The show has since been cancelled because of the tragedy.  Earlier this week, Ryan Jenkins was found in a Canada hotel room, hanging from a coat rack, dead.

In the interview, Jasmine’s mother speaks of her desire for justice and her relief that she now has it, because of Ryan’s death.  She referred to him as a “coward who didn’t want to face the consequences of his actions”, who took the “easy way out”.  She shares that she would have liked to have seen him behind bars.  It’s sad to me that this man’s death was not enough justice for her, and that she would feel better for him to suffer more before eventually meeting the same fate (death) as her daughter.  I really hesitate to even judge her reactions at this time, under these circumstances, but it fascinates me to think about the issues of justice in human terms.

I’ve had some interesting conversations with people over hypothetical situations that mirror stories like this.  Is there an appropriate response to death at the hands of another human?  Does it matter whether it is homicide or manslaughter?  Is revenge ever justified?  If you believe in a higher power, do you desire God to be vengeful, or forgiving?  If God is both, where is the dividing line?  If the dividing line is indiscernible, how then shall we live?

I think about and pray for the mother of Ryan Jenkins as well.  She has lost a son, and she probably does not even recognize the person being portrayed in the news that committed these acts.  Does she blame herself for how she raised him?  Does she wonder what could have been if she would have done something different?  How does she move on from here?

I’m not sure what all is to be learned from this.  Death is tragic at a young age, but it is a part of what happens in this world.  The survivors are the only ones capable of making things better after the fact.  We don’t want to prepare for it, but we my be call upon to respond to it.  God help us.

Update:  The mother of the children spoke to the local television news station last night.  You can read the transcript here and see a brief video of the interview.