Fasting for Ramadan as a non-Muslim – Day 5

By on August 5, 2011 in Personal, Religion

Whew.

I knew that I would have a rough day here and there, and today was one of those days.

Really, it started just after midnight. My son and I have an annual tradition of camping out for a night on or around his birthday. We’ve never missed a year, and last night seemed to be the best night to do it before school started and a string of rain storms came through town.

To make a short story gross, the front yard  camping ended prematurely with my poor little six-year old evacuating the contents of his stomach, bladder, and colon all at the same time. He did manage to get out of the tent before this happened, but there was quite a mess on the patio. Turns out that s’mores do not sit as well with him as they used to.

My wife went into nurse mode (something she absolutely rocks at) and I went into janitor mode (something I am less than adequate at). My garden hose didn’t quite reach the mess, so I had to set that up in the front yard, spray down the crime scene, and take down the tent. When I went inside to check on my son, he was living the good life in Hospital de Mama, which happens to be located on my side of our bed. I gave them both a kiss goodnight, and then headed down to my son’s bed for the rest of the night (morning). It was 2:00am.

After getting a nice meal in before sunrise (something I neglected to do the day before), I decided that I didn’t have time to meditate (something I also neglected to do the day before). I had a networking meeting to attend, and it was time to get ready.

I’m a hot shower kind of guy. Heck, I’m even a hot bath kind of guy. I like it hotter than anyone in my family. But during my fast, I have been more of a lukewarm bather. Due to my lack of being mindful from my meditation, I cranked that puppy up to normal hell-fire temperatures. It was wonderful and refreshing. I was ready to face the day. Time to press some flesh and make some contacts.

Oh, what’s that dripping down my face? Probably just water from the shower. No big deal.

Even 30 minutes into the meeting, I looked like I had just finished pushing my car up a hill. My core temperature was through the roof. I was sweating something fierce. Probably not the branding that I want to portray for a networking event.

However, I did get to use the opportunity to share my occasion for fasting. I got some strange looks when I mentioned that I was showing solidarity with my Muslim friends. I’m pretty sure that I was the only one there who was fasting. Even if I didn’t exactly succeed in branding myself as a professional, I was glad to have brought up Ramadan and brought that to the attention of a few people.

As you may have guessed, the sweating quickly dehydrated me. Little sleep + little mindfulness = crappy feeling.

For the rest of the day, I felt like I had a feather boa around my neck, except I didn’t look fancy like that. I thought about my missed meditation often. Oh lotus position, how I miss thee!

My fast was broken at 7:57 in the Kohl’s customer service department water fountain. It might as well have been an oasis in the middle of the Sahara. Back to school shopping never tasted so good.

Now with life-nourishing refreshment!

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  • tpos

    Aww sounds like a pretty full-on day. How’s your son feeling now? And why were you sweating?
    Not getting ill yourself, are you?

    lol I can imagine the strange looks!

  • http://www.zacparsons.com Zac

    Yes. I had a number of appointments throughout the day as well. It was quite draining. A friend of mine told me that days 4-5 are often the most difficult, and your body settles into a bit of a routine after that.

    I feel much better today. Maybe I’ll go take a run!

  • Phil

    Just getting caught up with your blog since returning from my conference. Looks like things are going well (s’mores incident aside).

    Being a fairly soft middle class American, I am looking at your fast as a guy who is constantly wondering what I am made of. When I think of fasting I think of it as a challenge more than anything else. Am I man enough to do this?

    The answer I have found is that no, I am not man enough to go without food (or water) for an extended period of time. I have a hard time looking past the “what” I am doing to see the value of the “why”. It is all about what I am giving up and going through, and not what I am learning or gaining. Fasts therefore have made me feel shame more than anything else, so I stay away from them.

    Also, food and eating for me is not just about fueling my body. It is a comforter and reward. It is a reason to be around friends and family. It is a something that I can control. When we are talking about food, I always get exactly what I want. Where else can you say that in life?

    So quite simply food plays a role in my life that it was never meant to play, and fasting screws that up. Hell, eating a healthy diet screws that up. It all becomes about what I am depriving myself.

    It has been interesting reading about your experience as well as the links about those families fleeing famines and starvation. I read about women who chose to give up a child so that her other children may live, and I am unwilling to give up my morning pop-tart.

    What I do know is that people who can successfully deny themselves things that would otherwise hold sway over them have a wisdom that I haven’t quite attained yet. There is something about breaking through those physical and mental walls that must teach a person things about themselves that they did not know prior to going through the experience.

    Keep going Zac, you are doing great.

  • http://www.zacparsons.com Zac

    @Phil – Wow. Thank you for your deeply honest comments and encouragement.

    To be honest, a lot of this fast is about whether or not I am man enough to do it as well. To your final point, talk is cheap, and I’m only learning this about myself through actually doing it. I haven’t even made it 1/5th of the way through yet, so it remains to be seen if I can conquer my own doubts about being able to complete it. I am, however, very proud of myself for making it so far. While literally hundreds of millions of Muslims are doing this now (and many have been doing it for decades of their lives), I had real doubts about whether or not my body could handle such a fast.

    It turns out that this really is a “mind over matter” situation. While it’s not an especially valuable feat to be able to abstain from food and water, I am hoping that the realization of my actual physical limits will help me to push myself further in other areas of my life where I am limiting myself.

    I hope that the conference was fruitful and worthwhile. More walls to break through for both of us it seems.

  • tpos

    Good to hear you’re feeling better :)

    Just don’t go on a run whilst fasting…obviously! lol

    I think, if you’re willing to it’s quite easy giving up food and drink – even if you like your food. It just seems scary at first! You could always over eat when opening/closing it :p lol (actually I find I can’t do that, eating less than the normal amount fills me up pretty quick as the stomach gets used to the new routine)

    (fasting for muslims isn’t just about giving up food and drink though)

  • Phil

    tpos,

    I have really enjoyed your comments on this subject.

    I am sure that those of the Muslim faith have much to gain from their fasting. I had a friend in college who observed Ramadan and I seem to remember him focusing a lot on experiencing empathy for those less fortunate (I think he and his family even donated food to the homeless at the end of his time fasting…can’t quite remember the details). I don’t know if this is a regular practice with all who fast for Ramadan, but it seemed to make it a much deeper experience for him than simply denying himself food.

  • tpos

    Hey, Phil :) I’m Glad you like my comments.

    Yep, you’ve touched upon another thing that fasting is about – charity.

    Whilst fasting we are supposed to reflect on the favours of God, how we are much better off than many others and be grateful for it. But not just stop there, we should be giving charity to these people and even our own family, friends and neighbours. There is great reward for giving out food to people to open their fasts with – even if it’s half a date! (dates are traditionally used to open fasts)

    It is obligatory for all Muslims (past puberty)* to pay 2.5% of their savings to charity, annually. This is called zakah and it is the 4th pillar of Islam. There are certain people who can and cannot have this charity and there are other things that need to be taken into account when giving this.

    I’m mentioning this because most people tend to give their zakah in ramadhan.

    Also there is zakat-ul-fitr, which is charity given at the end of ramadhan and which may have been what your friend gave. This type of charity is not obligatory, like the former, *but* it is necessary (there is a slight difference in Islamic rulings between the two)

    http://www.therevival.co.uk/back-2-basics-zakaah << This article explains both types of charity simply enough for even a non-muslim to understand…so if you do want to know more about it… :)

  • tpos

    But moving away from the whole food aspect, we are supposed to control all our desires and actions during the time we are fasting.

    For example one saying of the Prophet Muhammad(pbuh) is that
    ” When any one of you gets up in the morning in the state of fasting, he should neither use obscene language nor do any act of ignorance. And if anyone slanders him or quarrels with him, he should say:” I am fasting, I am fasting.”

    another is:

    “Whoever does not give up forged speech and evil actions, Allah is not in need of his leaving his food and drink (i.e. Allah will not accept his fasting.)”

    another is:

    “Five things break a man’s fast: lying, backbiting, gossiping, perjury and a lustful gaze.”

    I think you get the jist – we have to fast not only with our mouths, but our eyes, ears, hands and feet. We cannot speak badly, go to a forbidden place, do a forbidden action and so on and so forth. (ofcourse this should be done a normal day too anyway but its more important when fasting and it also gives people the chance to make a change, if they don’t normally do it)

    By controlling our desires (food and other actions -sexual intercourse also breaks the fast) a person is able to concentrate on themselves, get rid of bad habits and better themselves.

    Along with an increased amount of praying and remembering God, this should make a person more patient and God-conscious and therefore better all round.

    And if an individual can achieve this during this month then it tells a person that they can do it on a normal day too!

    Err I know that was long :$ just felt I should point it out.

  • http://www.zacparsons.com Zac

    @Tpos – Thanks for pointing all of this out and providing some additional details to the celebration of Ramadan.

    I have an honest question, and I don’t mean to offend with it, so please forgive me if it is disrespectful.

    But, in your opinion, does the mandate to be “extra” vigilant in one’s spiritual disciplines tend to help you in your faith, or weaken you? Put another way, do you tend to act less holy during the rest of the year when there is not as strong of an emphasis on right behaviors?

    Does my question make sense?

    Thanks.

  • tpos

    Your Q make’s sense and I’m not offended :)

    First of all though, there is no mandate. Well nothing obligatory, everything is just recommended. The rewards for acts of worship are multiplied in Ramadhan, prayers are more likely to be accepted, sins are more likely to be forgiven so the onus is on the individual to take advantage of the month.

    As a saying of Prophet Muhammad(pbuh) goes : ‎”Ramadan has come to you. It is a month of blessing, in which Allah covers you with blessings, for He sends down Mercy, decreases sins and answers prayers. In it, Allah looks at your competition in good deeds, and boasts about you to His angels. So show Allah goodness from yourselves, for the unfortunate one
    is he who is deprived in (this month) of the mercy of Allah, the Mighty, the Exalted.”

    I don’t think telling someone they have to do leave their world of non-praying, backbiting, drinking, etc etc will have any effect on them. Yeah, if you’re young you might be scared of your parents wrath or something. But once you’re older and more independent, you won’t really care especially if you can’t see the consequences right there and then.

    So even in Ramadhan people won’t pray, they won’t leave their bad deeds and they’ll continue as usual. Heck some people won’t even fast!

    But I think that Q was for me personally…

    taking into account what I’ve already said, I believe you can’t be spiritually connected to God unless you understand Him, the religion, the holy book, the Prophets.

    My parents are pretty strict Muslims and they have always tried to make me the best possible Muslim. But by them just telling me I need to do something, I didn’t really always do it. Not with the enthusiasm and sincerity that it required, anyway. (Ok there are times when that still happens, but its less than before…im working on it ;) )

    I’ve always been interested in Islam and I like to read/look into it and the more I do, the more I understand it’s amazingness. The fact that I *understand* makes me feel more connected to the religion and God, and makes my worship much better, for I am not doing it because I have to but because I want to – out of my love, respect, gratefulness, for my want to be closer to my creator, to benefit from all the great things that are on offer both in this world and the next.

    I listen to stuff about hell and heaven and this motivates me for a little while but the thoughts of punishments and rewards get a little ‘old’ after a while tbh. It is only when I look into the rational reasons for why I’m doing whatever I’m doing and the general background behind things including worship/islamic history etc that I truly feel I should be more practising. (Yes Islam is very rational!)

    Can I say at this point, that right now for some reason, Im finding it very hard to think up sentences, my mind seems to be and was whilst I wrote that ^, blank :/

    My spirituality levels go up and down all the time tbh and I guess it depends on how close I try to get to the religion. These last couple of months, especially I had a great spark and then it just went. (Ironically, it was when I was trying to understand something better but couldn’t. That frustrated me and I gave up for a while)

    There have been ramadhan’s in the past where I did not take the full opportunity to be better. This Ramadhan has perhaps been my best so far (I’m 17 – so thats ok, right? :p ) I am still slacking and not getting everything I want to, done, but I am doing far more than I would on a normal day so Im happy with that. And these things take time, If I was to just dive into it, my enthusiasm would run out much quicker and I’d just DIE :O lol

    One step at a time. This even recommended by Islam, classic example being the gradual prohibition of alcohol.

    It’s also important not to get too comfortable doing a certain number of good things instead of gradually not pushing yourself up.

    So you’ll notice I mentioned being spiritual earlier on the year too – that should answer the Q as to whether I can be more spiritual outside or not.

    But this ramadhan, its been incredibly helpful that its the summer holidays so I have much more time to use – although that almost ruined me too. The week before ramadhan started I had a bit too much fun. Although what I did wasn’t actually forbidden or anything, cuz I didn’t pay attention much to God , I felt my spiriuality levels being pretty down and I was scared I wouldn’t use this month wisely. However as soon as I heard Ramadhan has started, I felt great! I felt excited, happy and thankful and just thought ‘Bring on the challenge!’ Well who wouldn’t be happy knowing the devil’s locked up?! :D

    Now, whether my spirituality levels keep up after this ramadhan…well free to ask later :)

    Ok, I’m not sure if i’ve properly answered your Q or if the post is even coherent or not. My mind has been almost completely blank the whole time! For some reason it was hard stringing sentences together! :S …(ok it might be the fact its 2am…lol)

    If you have any more Qs, feel free to ask

  • tpos

    Woah thats long!

  • Lilly

    Forgive me for taking the liberty of answering the question too.

    Im not sure if i’ll be able to explain and convey what i mean clearly, but i’ll try my very bestest!

    in answer to your question, no, i will not *willingly* act less holy outside of Ramadan. i thnk it comes down to the “want to”/”have to” thing mentionned in day 6. that, mixed with understanding the purpose of Ramadan.

    Ramadan is not the time where you “become more holy”, well, i dont see it that way. For me, It’s the time that you put EVERYTHING aside (easier done during the beautiful empty holidays of August) and focus totally on what we believe is our sole aim and purpose on Earth. Worshipping Allah and seeking forgiveness and just doing all you can to be a “good” muslim during that time, because we believe that Ramadan is *special*, its like..hmm… Sales time for gaining good deeds. During Ramadan good deeds are easier to do, for a few reasons, one of them being that its your main focus, another is that we believe the “bad guys” who whisper to us and tempt us are tied up, so we can focus on Allah more easily.

    just like sales time, you put everything aside and just make sure you buy everything you need or might need during that short period. So we just throw ourselves into Ramadan trying to get the most of it and wasting the less possible time in doing things that wont get us good deeds. (but…if you play your cards right, you can get good deeds out of everything really..but thats another story..)

    Ramadan enables us to reach the highest we can be, to prove it to ourselves, to teach ourselves discipline and patience and gratitude and all these others things which is going to help us last the rest of the year. The level of faith you gain, all muslims hope and pray, will last them until the NEXT Ramadan, and will help them in their day to day life to carry out their purpose on Earth, worshipping Allah. – when you buy stuff in sales, you dont give it back after sales time is over.

    but thats not what happens to ALL muslims right? and the problem is not in Ramadan or the Idea of Ramadan, nope, its in the people and the way they approach Ramadan. some muslims come in with the wrong intention of being super holy for this month and going back to normal afterwards. they see it as a ritual, something you gotta do (here we go again the “have to”) something they dont understand the purpose of and just want to get over and done with to go back to “normal” life. These muslims will, after ramadan feel like they’ve “been holy enough for the year” or something along those lines and so might just let themselves go afterwards. but i hope you can see that it’s just the wrong thing to do, the wrong approach leading to the wrong outcome.

    just to clear a misunderstanding (just re-read the question) Ramadan doesnt put an extra strong emphasis on right behaviours. Like Tpos pointed out, it does ask for some minimal things, but these should be carried out all year round, and they arent Hercules tasks either, backbiting, lying, slandering etc.. are things even non-muslims might hate and chose not to take part in. Ramadan actually offers you the opportunity to get high on faith, and it helps greatly to do the “right behaviours” or not do the wrong ones. So when you come out of Ramadan, you dont think “oh finally! i can do this and that! finalllyyyyyy”, nope. because ideally, you would have given up all these things willingly.

    I really hope this somehow answers at least partly your question. and as Muslims say; Allah knows best.

  • Lilly

    I’d just like to say: DISCLAIMER! I didnt know what Tpos was going to write or wrote when i was writing my answer!

  • tpos

    lol I’m glad we’re on the same wavelength lilly. :D

  • christy

    my very short answer….
    i see Ramadan as a reset button.

  • http://www.zacparsons.com Zac

    @Tpos – First off, let me just say that I really appreciate your open and honest answer to the question (fully coherent or not :) ). I’m getting a better idea of what drives you to be closer to Allah, and it’s not some rulebook or the arbitrary dates of Ramadan.

    Secondly, I think it’s great that you are really focusing on your own spiritual growth at your age. 17 is actually my favorite number. For me, it was the first year that I started to physically look more like a man than a boy. I too was deeply spiritual, and hungry for as much information that I could get regarding my faith and how to make it my own. It’s funny, my own spiritual fervor at that time actually helped to bring my parents back to a more active and genuine faith.

    In a lot of ways, you are reminding me of myself at that age. I’m 31 now, and a lot has changed for me, as you have probably gathered. You’ll have some changes as well, but that doesn’t mean that you’ll end up losing your faith over them. I encourage you to keep meeting new people (like me!) and do some traveling if you can. This will only help to give you a better idea about who you are, what the world is, and how you (and Allah) all fit within that.

    I’m glad to here that Islam is not about mandates. In certain media coverage here, it is depicted as more of a legalistic faith, based on strict compliance to gain salvation (and avoid hell).

    For me, Christianity became real when I focused on trying to take on the mind of Jesus. There was a fad a few years back known as “What Would Jesus Do”? Can you guess what it was all about? ;)

    I didn’t have a checklist for maintaining my salvation and keeping my faith in good standing. It was about trying to approach every situation in the same manner that Jesus would.

    It’s kind of interesting. Many of the things that my Christian church taught me about Islam spoke of the wide and irreconcilable differences. But the more that I learn about Islam on my own, I see a whole world of similarities.

    Thanks again Tpos. I’m glad that you let your brain and typing hands go on autopilot at 2AM today. ;)

  • http://www.zacparsons.com Zac

    @Lilly – I think that I am understanding your sales metaphor. I do enjoy a good sale, and I understand what you mean by not giving the goods back after the sale is over.

    Now, this is one aspect of Islam that seems to differ from Christianity as I experienced it. These “good deeds” were often scoffed at by Christians, who preached that it was “faith alone” that brought salvation and a right relationship with God. However, those same Christians (myself included) would invariably have an unwritten list of right and wrong behaviors that would separate Christians from non-Christians. After all, the word “holy” means “separate”, so any Christian seeking to be holy would also be separating themselves from others, presumably by their actions. All in the name of God.

    I appreciate your idea of getting high on faith. This is not a time of denying yourself, it is about removing any distractions from Allah, right? And this should be a time of rejoicing, right? Because if not, what’s the point?

    Thx for commenting. I appreciate your perspective on this. I’m learning new things about this all the time.

  • http://www.zacparsons.com Zac

    @Christy – I can see how Christian holidays would act as a sort of reset button for me as well.

  • tpos

    I’m sorry about my post! It’s got commas where they aren’t needed, words missing and I’ve wrote about my mind being blank twice! I was actually supposed to cut+paste the first one at the bottom but forgot. Ah the shame.

    I don’t know why I mentioned my age? But I’m glad it’s your favourite number :D And good on ya for strengthening for your parents’ faith :D

    wow, really, I remind you of yourself?! :)

    Yep, I have gathered you’ve changed and I can understand your questions regarding Christianity but I didn’t want to talk about that (before, on the church post) in case it looks like I’m trying to convert you or I offend anyone.

    I love meeting new people :D and would absolutely love to travel around the world, but I don’t think that will be possible cuz of constraints like money!
    Have you travelled much? Where to? What did you like best? what did you get of it? Have you already blogged about this?

    Hmm, I don’t know if what you have got from my post is true or not – what do you mean a legalistic faith?

    Because Islam is a way of life, not just a religion. Therefore it covers all aspects of life; both religious and non-religious. So, yes it does have laws to follow and even its own law system…

    I don’t know if that explains anything, or is related to what you meant :/

    And I wouldn’t trust much of what the media says about Islam.

    Lol, I’ve heard of that fad. And actually Muslims try to approach everything in the same way as the Prophet Muhammad(pbuh) would’ve, just like you tried to, with Jesus (pbuh). He is meant to be our role model and following his way of life is incredibly important to Muslims especially as it is written in the Qur’an to do so. However we do not worship him.

    What kind of things did your Church teach you about Islam? I don’t think there are many big differences, apart from believing in the trinity and that Jesus (pbuh) died on that cross for everyones sins…

    Oh, and I don’t understand – why would Christians scoff at good deeds? :S

    No problem/you’re welcome, although I don’t think I should be writing stuff like this at 2am, maybe I should just start sleeping instead of staying awake until dawn…

    And I appreciate the long reply, back! :D

  • http://www.zacparsons.com Zac

    @Tpos – No worries about discussing Christianity. I’m happy to do so. Despite my own personal exodus from the church, I am still quite connected with a number of pastors, missionaries, and genuinely devoted church folk all over the place. Many of them look at me a little sideways, as I used to be a real champion of the faith.

    Regarding traveling, I haven’t traveled far and wide, although I did make it to Haiti a couple of years ago. Search for “Haiti” in my search box, and you’ll get an unfinished chronicle of that trip, if you’re interested.

    Regarding laws, rules, Islam, and Christianity, this is where Christianity might really be confusing. The Catholic church was the one true church for about a millennium and a half (well, there is also the Eastern Orthodox church, but don’t worry about that for now). About 500 years ago, a guy named Martin Luther decided that he was sick of the church’s focus on good deeds and the ability to remove sins by actual monetary payments. He wrote out all of his complaints and nailed them to the door of a church in a town called Whitenburg. He had 95 points in all. His ideas gained a lot of traction, and the Protestant movement was born.

    Ever since then, the Protestants and the Catholics have fought (or argued, although there have been bloody wars) over a number of topics, and the debate over faith vs. works is a biggie. Protestants believe that there is nothing that humans can do to earn salvation, so good works are not a part of the picture at all. Catholics believe that good works are the fruits of a true faith, and that the church can help a Christian to be in right standing with God.

    Because of that, many of the Protestants that I know have a real problem with focusing on good deeds or good works. Don’t get me wrong, they still do those things, but they separate it theologically from their own salvation. It may seem like splitting hairs, but this might explain some of the knee-jerk reactions that Christians have to an emphasis on good works.

    I should probably look some of this up to verify things, but I’m just spitballing here. Does any of this make sense about Christians?

  • Sofia

    I just stumbled over..and i must say im very impressed ! :-) there is nothing like exercising basic rules of abstaining from food & drink for some lessons in self disciplining:P

    The first few days, imhe, are the most difficult. As your mind & body get used to the change, youll find the rest of the days smooth sailing. She says!

    Good luck! I shall eagerly follow your updates to see how far you get. And most importantly, how you feel about your experiences on reflection.

  • http://www.zacparsons.com Zac

    @Sofia – Thanks for the read and the compliment.

    It does seem to be getting easier, but then again, we aren’t even 1/3 of the way through the month yet!

    Thanks for reminding me about the reflection. Sometimes I feel a little sappy posting those things. But you’re right, they are important.

  • Lilly

    wouah! learning new things!

    yep, Ramadan is about just focusing on Allah, and there are only that many hours in the day, so that means removing some stuff from the to-do lists. or we can call them “distractions”.

    and rejoicing, getting high, on anything (no..no..i was talking about cherryade! CHERRYADE!!), is always a time of happiness.

  • tpos

    Hmm I know about the Catholic church and eastern orthodox church and how the church has split into a number of denominations but I thought King Henry started the Protestant Movement :S That’s what I was taught in school, anyway. As far as I remember.

    I never knew they didn’t believe in being able to achieve salvation though! That’s pretty depressing :/ or maybe it’s not – so what do they see as their purpose in life?

    I think it’s hard to understand because all Christians are meant to be born sinful* because of Adam and Eve’s mistake. (I was also taught women have labour pain as a punishment for Eve’s mistake. :\ ) So if they can’t ever achieve salvation, then what’s the point?

    Wait I might be confusing two things.

    Do Protestants believe good deeds dont do anything but they will get salvation through Jesus dying for them?

    I do think it was wrong to pay for their sins to be erased, though

    *Something I would find hard to accept if I was a Christian – carrying your forefathers sins.

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  • http://www.zacparsons.com Zac

    @Tpos – I think I might have confused you a bit. Christians believe in salvation, they just don’t believe that they earn it. They believe that it is a gift from God. They believe that believing in Jesus is not a good deed, however, that is what it takes to gain salvation.

    Also, I’m not sure that all Christians believe that they carry their forefathers’ sins. Some do, sure. But most Christians believe that they have their own sins that have them worthy of going to hell.

    It’s all a mess. :/

  • tpos

    oh ok, I understand now, thanks

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