Adding some new disciplines, Father Abraham style – Part 2

About a week and a half ago, I decided to add some more discipline to my life and my daily regimen. First on my list: be early to rise.

Well, I think that I managed that for about three or four days. Then I had an extended out of state trip for five days, and I haven’t gotten back into that discipline since. I could blame the trip for disturbing my circadian rhythms, but I can’t explain why I haven’t been able to pick the discipline up again since I’ve been back. It’s been quite disappointing to have my Father Abraham style fall apart so quickly.

However, I have a theory or two.

First, why would I expect that adding a new discipline would be as simple as just committing to do it? Changing one’s life is much more difficult than that. Actually, difficult is the wrong word. But certainly I should have had more respect for rising early than I began with. After all, many people (myself included) have made a commitment to exercise more, only to watch our default sedentary behavior settle back in after a short time.

Habits

Habits take some time to groove into life.

I’m imagining that my life is a rotating disc, sort of like a record player. Let’s say that I want to groove a new pattern into the sphere. I would have to apply enough pressure to the disc to make sure that the correct pattern was imprinted. This isn’t about just taking my hand all the way around the circle and calling it a day. In order to have a uniform groove, I actually need to hold my position and allow the rest of the circle to come to me.

This seems contrary to a self-efficacious, internal locus of control type of philosophy. However, life doesn’t just take place in the perfect present tense. In fact, something more like the continuous present tense is more appropriate for affecting real behavior change.

Before this gets into a full-on grammar or syntax lesson, let’s just settle on the importance of continuous, conscious focus. Even tying our shoes was crazy hard for a few weeks before we dropped that task into the subconscious somewhere. Most habits work this way as well. It’s rarely “one and done”.

Mood and motivation

Another monkey wrench in this process of adding a new discipline or habit is the widely varying moods that we find ourselves in throughout the day. There are days when I wake up with a clenched fist, ready to take on the day with the fire of a man possessed. These are usually quite productive mornings. Depending on my diet, the weather, the people that I meet with, the tasks on my plate, and a number of other factors, my mood  can often change dramatically by the afternoon. Suddenly, I don’t have quite the same amount of energy and motivation to face the world as what I woke up with.

Most of our decisions to change our lives come from moods of feeling highly self-efficacious. We are ready to fight hell with a bucket of water, and we would try it even without the bucket. Or water. And when the flames come (as they always do), we often decide that the moment is bigger than we are, and we bail.

On a rational level, this doesn’t make a lot of sense. Using the example of dieting, we know that cheeseburgers tend to end up on our hips, and don’t any favors for our arteries either. In the moment of beginning a diet, this all makes sense. The facts are clear. The moment of pleasure on our tongue is clearly outweighed by the long-term effects of fat and cholesterol, at least in terms of time that our body deals with them. So we make the commitment.. and scratch our heads when we fail.

The trick is getting past our conscious level mood, back to our original, rational motivation for the change.

The sad part about all of this is that I know all of this information, and yet still attempted it on willpower alone. It’s now time for a bit of a plan B.

I’m going to add the discipline of being early to rise again, but with a lot more of the emotion and value of doing it infused within. Instead of just telling myself to do it, I’ll be visualizing myself waking up early, and including the emotional details of why it is valuable for me to do so.

I want to begin my day with some momentum and energy. I want to be in the right mindset to wake up my kids, feed them breakfast, and see them off to school. I want to begin my work with a clear understanding of why it is important to complete it.

I want to write some more about this, but it’s time to start visualizing. I’ll check back with you later…