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	<title>ZacParsons.com &#187; guest blogger</title>
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	<description>Psychology</description>
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		<title>Guest Blogger &#8211; Ben Thompson &#8211; What Happened to Freddy Adu?</title>
		<link>http://www.zacparsons.com/2010/06/guest-blogger-ben-thompson-what-happened-to-freddy-adu/</link>
		<comments>http://www.zacparsons.com/2010/06/guest-blogger-ben-thompson-what-happened-to-freddy-adu/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 06 Jun 2010 21:47:11 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Sports]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Ben Thompson]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Freddy Adu]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[guest blogger]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[soccer]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Team USA]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[World Cup]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.zacparsons.com/?p=877</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[It must have been depressing.  Sitting in the corner at his own birthday party, staring into his reflection in a bottle of Budweiser.  Slowly picking at the label, trying to peel the condensation soaked paper away from the bottle without tearing it.  At least, I have to think that’s what I would’ve been doing.  I [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://www.zacparsons.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/Freddy-arms.jpg"><img class="size-medium wp-image-879 alignright" title="Freddy Arms" src="http://www.zacparsons.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/Freddy-arms-300x240.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="240" /></a>It must have been depressing.  Sitting in the corner at his own birthday party, staring into his reflection in a bottle of Budweiser.  Slowly picking at the label, trying to peel the condensation soaked paper away from the bottle without tearing it.  At least, I have to think that’s what I would’ve been doing.  I can’t help but wonder what types of thoughts were circling through Freddy Adu’s brain last Wednesday as he celebrated his 21st birthday.  A birthday that he almost certainly had long imagined would be celebrated in South Africa, surrounded by his national squad teammates.  &#8221;This was supposed to be my tournament, my chance to show the world what I can do.&#8221;</p>
<p>In the fall of 2003, at the age of fourteen, <a href="http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2003/11/20/national/main584743.shtml" target="_blank">Freddy Adu became the youngest athlete to sign an American professional sports contract in over a century</a>.  Along with his MLS contract, a very lucrative deal with Nike had thrust the Ghana-born US citizen into the spotlight.  The hype surrounding his signing with Major League Soccer had caused quite a stir.  Was it possible that the best young soccer player in the world was actually right here in the shadows of our nation’s capital, and would one day lead the red, white, and blue to international glory on the pitch?  Major League Soccer certainly thought so.</p>
<div id="attachment_878" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 281px"><a href="http://www.zacparsons.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/Freddy-Adu-kiss.jpg"><img class="size-medium wp-image-878" title="Freddy Adu kiss" src="http://www.zacparsons.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/Freddy-Adu-kiss-271x300.jpg" alt="Freddy gets a kiss from Pele" width="271" height="300" /></a><p class="wp-caption-text">Freddy gets a kiss from Pele</p></div>
<p>Adu was signed to DC United and made his first appearances with them in 2004.  The pundits were skeptical.  Some feared for the boy’s safety, while others claimed that if he were as good as they claimed that he should be sent to one of the top youth academies overseas.  Other players were skeptical as well.  Just because a kid is quick and skilled does not mean that he should be competing at the professional level.  However the US soccer program had already dubbed him as their white knight, and there would be no turning back.</p>
<p>When I heard about Freddy Adu, and saw the approach that was being taken to groom him for stardom, I laughed.  This was going to be a disaster.  My logic was simple:  If you are grooming somebody to be a dominant athlete, the worst possible thing you can do is make them a role player.  Freddy Adu had been taken from playing against high school kids, where he could learn to take over games and dominate competition, to playing against men twice his age, where he would be relegated to coming off the bench and playing on the outside midfield.</p>
<p>Then, a rare thing happened:  I turned out to be right.  In the seven years since, Adu has had a journeyman career.  He has played for six clubs in the last five years, and was not even invited to US National Team camp last month.  He is currently plying his trade in Greece, and no more than an afterthought on the American soccer landscape.  A disappointing, though not surprising, result of the path that was set for him seven years ago.</p>
<p>All hope is not lost for Freddy.   At age 21, he will still have two more chances to perform on the world’s biggest stage.  While his current situation can be attributed to decisions that were made for him as a fourteen year old, Freddy still has the opportunity to look inside himself (or, at least into his reflection in a bottle of legally purchased beer) and set his own course for the next decade.</p>
<address>Ben Thompson is a freelance writer based out of Tempe, AZ.  He has been known to describe himself as fantastically adequate.  You can <a href="http://twitter.com/benjaminjt" target="_blank">follow him on Twitter</a> through the World Cup, and beyond.</address>
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		<title>Guest Blogger &#8211; Ben Thompson &#8211; World Cup Fever</title>
		<link>http://www.zacparsons.com/2010/06/guest-blogger-ben-thompson-world-cup-fever/</link>
		<comments>http://www.zacparsons.com/2010/06/guest-blogger-ben-thompson-world-cup-fever/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 06 Jun 2010 14:16:18 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Sports]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Ben Thompson]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Clint Dempsey]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[guest blogger]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Landon Donovan]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[soccer]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Team USA]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[World Cup]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.zacparsons.com/?p=871</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[My left eye burst open as the all too familiar shrieking of my alarm clock pierced the calm silence of my bedroom this morning.  Still not fully aware of what was happening, muscle memory had located and silenced the offender within a matter of seconds.  The right side of my face still buried in a [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><!--StartFragment--><span style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande';"><a href="http://www.zacparsons.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/Walken.jpg"><img class="alignright size-medium wp-image-872" title="I've got a fever" src="http://www.zacparsons.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/Walken-300x224.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="224" /></a>My left eye burst open as the all too familiar shrieking of my alarm clock pierced the calm silence of my bedroom this morning.  Still not fully aware of what was happening, muscle memory had located and silenced the offender within a matter of seconds.  The right side of my face still buried in a pillow, my left eyeball scanned the room for some sort of explanation of what in the name of Jake Gyllenhaal&#8217;s beard was happening.  Slowly things started to come together.  It&#8217;s 5:30&#8230; it&#8217;s Saturday&#8230; hands are a little clammy&#8230; forehead is a little warm.  It&#8217;s all vaguely familiar.  I remembered a similar sensation from a few summers ago.  Ah, yes&#8230; yes I remember now.  The Fever.  I&#8217;ve come down with a case of the World Cup Fever.  Symptoms include rising with the sun every day for a month, regularly throwing back a pint with breakfast, and overuse of terms such as &#8220;match&#8221; and &#8220;pitch&#8221; in place of the more Americanized &#8220;game&#8221; and &#8220;field.&#8221;</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande';">World Cup fever is definitely back, and despite being six days out of the official start of the tournament, I found myself stumbling out to the recliner at 5:30 Arizona time this morning to watch the US take on Australia in their final tuneup &#8220;match&#8221; before taking to the &#8220;pitch&#8221; against England next Saturday, June 12.  The contest came and went in very similar fashion to their two previous friendlies against Czech Republic and Turkey.  There were some offensive highlights, some defensive miscues, and overall I came away with a sense that I had just watched a team that is still struggling to figure out exactly who they are.  Which begs the question:  Who exactly are these guys, and what chance do they stand of making a name for themselves amongst the world&#8217;s elite over the next few weeks?  I&#8217;m glad you asked.</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"><br />
</span></p>
<h2><span><span style="color: #ff0000;">The Roster</span></span></h2>
<p><span style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande';">The US roster is a relatively inexperienced one, in terms of international competition.  While names like Landon Donovan, Clint Dempsey, and Tim Howard are fairly well-known in the worldwide soccer community, the rest of the roster has traveled to South Africa in relative anonymity.  From head coach Bob Bradley on down, the team as a whole is putting on a confident front going into the competition.  An attitude to which they may be entitled, considering that most experts are picking them to advance out of their group into the knockout stages.  However, those predictions are most likely based more on the teams the Americans will be facing, rather than on the roster itself.  Algeria and Slovenia, while not pushovers, are considered among the weaker teams in the field of 32.  As a result, England and the USA are really the most logical choices to advance from Group C.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande';">The roster itself suffered a big blow when striker Charlie Davies was severely injured in an auto accident last fall, and suffered another big setback less than a month later when top defender Oguchi Onyewu tore his patellar tendon in a qualifying match.  Onyewu returned to training early this spring, but still seems very uncertain on that knee, and it is starting to become obvious that he is still quite a ways out from being the dominant physical presence that the US need him to be in the heart of their defense.  Davies, despite a miraculous recovery to return to training in the spring, was left off of the World Cup roster.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande';">The one area in which the Americans can be comfortable, is goalkeeping.  Top keeper Tim Howard is regarded as one of the world&#8217;s best, and he is not only healthy, but also playing at the pinnacle of his career.  Backups Marcus Hahnemann and Brad Guzan are very adequate if they need to be called upon.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande';">The defense in front of Howard has looked shaky at best over the last few weeks.  Onyewu remains a question mark, and fellow central defender Jay Demerit does not seem to have the awareness to orchestrate the defensive organization.  The outside defenders have repeatedly been caught watching when the attacks come from the opposite side of the field, giving opponents numerous clear looks when they crash in on the back post.  As a general rule for outside defensive players:  The fewer times the announcers mention your name, the better your performance.  I have been hearing the names Spector, Cherundolo, and Bocanegra far too often, and I feel that if the US is to have a chance in this tournament, these players need to figure out a way to step up their game.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande';"><a href="http://www.zacparsons.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/Bob-Bradley.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-873" title="Bob Bradley" src="http://www.zacparsons.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/Bob-Bradley-218x300.jpg" alt="" width="218" height="300" /></a>The good news in terms of midfield is that Bob Bradley seems to have his lineup figured out, they seem to be healthy, and three of the four starters are legitimate international level players.  The bad news in terms of the midfield is the fourth starter: Ricardo Clark.  I have never seen a central midfielder do less on a soccer field.  This morning against the Socceroos he played the entire game, and I think I heard his name called two or three times.  This has been his motif since he became a regular on the national side a couple of years ago.  He must be an amazing practice player, because Bob Bradley is sticking with him, and most games I have no idea he is even on the field until the oppositions center midfield makes a wide open run through our defense and I scream &#8220;Who&#8217;s man was that!&#8221;   If it weren&#8217;t for Tivo I&#8217;d have no idea how bad Ricardo Clark really is.  Michael Bradley is a very capable center midfielder, and Donovan and Dempsey on the wings will give defenses fits from both sides.  Personally, I&#8217;d rather see Dempsey start at forward with Stuart Holden on the wing, but Bob Bradley does not return my calls.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande';">In the front, no one really knows what to expect.  The team&#8217;s most experienced striker, Jozy Altidore, is twenty years old and may have a bum ankle.  If he can go, he will be one of the starters, and despite the young age he is a rare combination of size and speed that will certainly make a difference for the US.  The other three roster forwards: Edson Buddle, Robbie Findley, and Hercules Gomez, have almost no experience on the international level.  Gomez has scored goals in two of the last three games off the bench, and I think could be a very effective super-sub coming late into games.  Edson Buddle put two in the back of the net today, possibly earning himself a starting spot against England next weekend.  Findley made the team because he is the closest thing the US has to Charlie Davies.  His speed will keep the defenses honest and create spaces for the offense that won&#8217;t be there when he is on the bench.  Findley has had some ups and downs in the last couple of contests, and is a bit of a wildcard going into the tournament.<br />
</span></p>
<h2><span><span style="color: #ff0000;">Analysis</span></span></h2>
<p><span style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande';">As a unit, I think the US has played below their potential in the three tuneup matches.  They seem to be lacking consistency because they don&#8217;t quite know what type of team they are.  This identity crisis is the difference between this team and the one from last year&#8217;s Confederations Cup.  Last summer the team hunkered down on the defensive end, and relied on their speed and athleticism to catch teams off-guard and create dangerous counterattacks.  My feeling is that with the available personnel, this same strategy is the United States&#8217; best chance of success.  They don&#8217;t have the talent to control and move the ball like a Brazil or an England, and if they get stretched their defense is not good enough to hold without help from the midfield.<br />
</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"><br />
</span><span style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande';">As of the writing of this sentence, we are faced with six days, nineteen hours and twenty-six minutes until we find out what the boys in blue are capable of.</span></p>
<address><span style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande';">Ben Thompson is a freelance writer based out of Tempe, AZ.  He has been known to describe himself as fantastically adequate.  You can <a href="http://twitter.com/benjaminjt" target="_blank">follow him on Twitter</a> through the World Cup, and beyond.</span></address>
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		<title>Guest Blogger &#8211; Erich Stauffer &#8211; The Winning Goals</title>
		<link>http://www.zacparsons.com/2009/09/guest-blogger-erich-stauffer-the-winning-goals/</link>
		<comments>http://www.zacparsons.com/2009/09/guest-blogger-erich-stauffer-the-winning-goals/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 18 Sep 2009 19:54:17 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Zac</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Sports]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[confidence]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[goals]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[guest blogger]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[writing]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.zacparsons.com/?p=360</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[It was our sophomore year in college and my ex-girlfriend had just started dating my best friend, Jason.  Jessica and I broke up shortly after I traveled over four hours to watch her graduate high school.  She had planned to attend KCU before we started dating, but the added pressure of going to school with [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>It was our sophomore year in college and my ex-girlfriend had just started dating my best friend, Jason.  Jessica and I broke up shortly after I traveled over four hours to watch her graduate high school.  She had planned to attend <a href="http://www.kcu.edu/homepage.php" target="_blank">KCU</a> before we started dating, but the added pressure of going to school with me the next year was too much.  She needed &#8220;wide open spaces&#8221; and room to make &#8220;big mistakes.&#8221;</p>
<div class="wp-caption alignright" style="width: 387px"><img class=" " title="Dixie Chicks" src="http://msnbcmedia4.msn.com/j/msnbc/Components/Photos/041020/041020Scoop_dixieChicks_hmed_1p.hmedium.jpg" alt="If you know why this picture is here... you get 5 cool points." width="377" height="246" /><p class="wp-caption-text">If you know why this picture is here... you get 5 cool points.</p></div>
<p>I found out that Jason was dating her when he kissed her in front of me for the first time.  At that moment I had to choose which person I cared about more.  I chose Jason and we&#8217;ve continued to be friends ever since.  The only reason I even mention Jessica is because she was not only a witness to both of the games in which I made the winning goals, but she may have been the <em>reason</em> I made the winning goals.</p>
<h4>Intramural Football</h4>
<p>No one on our team had ever played football in high school or college, but we did play our share of 2-hand touch in the grass outside of Water&#8217;s Hall.  I could throw the ball, but was never really picked to be quarterback.  I would mostly play the linebacker, wide-receiver, and safety positions &#8211; guaranteeing that I would be worn out by the end of the game.  It was usually Jason&#8217;s idea to play and it was his idea to join the intramural league.</p>
<p>Our team consisted of mostly the same guys who played 2-hand touch and (besides the guitar player) consisted entirely of our band, &#8220;Shog&#8221;.  Our season did not start out well and we continued to post losses.  By the end of the season we had yet to win a game.  The last game was against an upperclassman team, which also had members from one the other band on campus, &#8220;Crummies Church&#8221;.  It was literally a battle of the bands.</p>
<p>The game started off as other games had, but this time something was different.  We were putting points on the board and we were staying in the game.  Something else was different too.  Jessica had come to watch us that day.  As the end of the game approached, we were down, but not out. Whoever made the next touchdown would win the game.  I had never played quarterback, but at this moment, the ball was handed to me and the rest of our team ran to the end on the field. I through a Hail Mary pass above the heads of the opposing team.  Heath jumped to catch the ball &#8211; and he came down with it in the end zone. We had won the game!</p>
<h4>Intramural Floor Hockey</h4>
<p>Later on that year, the same team decided to play intramural floor hockey.  We thought we would have some advantages as we had been playing street hockey in rollerblades behind Ralph&#8217;s Supermarket all year.  We would lay shopping carts down as a hockey nets.</p>
<p>When the games began, the story that unfolded was somewhat different than what we imagined.  Because floor hockey is more like basketball than street hockey, requiring more running than skating, the basketball players who decided to join dominated the league. At least, they did until that fateful night when Jessica decided to watch our game.</p>
<p>Again, the game was back and forth, but then I felt it, that feeling.  It was the same feeling I had on the football feeling, the feeling when you know something is going to happen &#8211; and then it does.  I was at half-court and there were three guys between me and the net, but I cocked back and swung.  The ball went straight through all three guys, past the goalie, and into the net, winning the game.</p>
<p><img class="alignleft" title="The Muse" src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/f/f9/Museposter.jpg" alt="" width="255" height="350" /></p>
<h4>The Muse</h4>
<p>Jason and Jessica broke up shortly after field hockey season and all five members of Shog left KCU at the end of that year.  Jessica graduated from KCU and is now married.  Jason and I are as well, although not to each other.</p>
<p>The first movie we see together with another person in a new relationship tends to stick with us in our memory.  Jessica and I went to see the movie &#8220;She&#8217;s All That&#8221;.  Jason and Jessica went to see &#8220;The Muse&#8221;.</p>
<address>***Erich Stauffer is an Indianapolis web designer for <a href="http://www.telablue.com/" target="_blank">Telablue Inc.</a>, an Indianapolis web design firm and promotion company serving the needs of individuals and businesses throughout the midwest.  He co-writes a blog with me at <a href="http://www.managingactions.com" target="_blank">www.managingactions.com</a>and writes on his own blog at <a href="http://www.erichstauffer.com" target="_blank">www.erichstauffer.com</a>.</address>
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		<title>Guest Blogger &#8211; Matt Van Tassel &#8211; Team USA</title>
		<link>http://www.zacparsons.com/2009/06/guest-blogger-matt-van-tassel/</link>
		<comments>http://www.zacparsons.com/2009/06/guest-blogger-matt-van-tassel/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 25 Jun 2009 14:28:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Zac</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Sports]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[guest blogger]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[redemption]]></category>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.zacparsons.com/?p=177</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[It was November 15, 2006&#8230; &#8220;My Love&#8221; by Justin Timberlake was the number one song in the country, the first Transformers movie was still being shot, and the vast majority  of us had never heard of Barack Obama.  It was also the last time the Spanish national team lost a game. They had been 32-0-3 [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>It was November 15, 2006&#8230;</p>
<p>&#8220;My Love&#8221; by Justin Timberlake was the number one song in the country, the first Transformers movie was still being shot, and the vast majority  of us had never heard of Barack Obama.  It was also the last time the Spanish national team lost a game. They had been 32-0-3 since and won 15 games in a row. Pretty impressive streak.  It&#8217;s even more impressive when you consider the majority of the international games Spain plays are against European powerhouses like Italy, Germany, and England. That should help us all put in perspective how great the win the USA had today to snap Spain&#8217;s record-tying streak&#8230; and after the way they played in the first two games of the Confederation Cup (see Zac&#8217;s June 20th update) it is hard to believe they were even had a chance.</p>
<p>For those of you who didn&#8217;t catch Sundays action, the moon was in the seventh house, Jupiter was definitely aligned with Mars, and some how the USA snuck out of group play on a wing and a prayer. The 3-0 win over Egypt looked pretty good, but you weren&#8217;t sure if it was American hustle or if the Egyptians (insert Bengals humor here) were just gassed. Well los Estaduos Unidos answered that in a major way Wednesday.</p>
<p>Diving headers. Bicycle kicks. Flying knees. Muscling Spaniards off the ball. Hustle. The Americans didn&#8217;t jog back, they got back. Onyewu and DeMerit were monsters in the middle and ensured Timmy Howard got a clean sheet against a team which could be talked about as the greatest team ever. The forwards played smart, and when their opportunities arose they delivered. Landon Donovan lived up to John Harkes&#8217; man crush and made good decisions,  which he usually doesn&#8217;t. They found some passion. But I&#8217;ve danced this dance before. I&#8217;ve predicted deep runs into World Cup, only to see them bounced with a lone point and a bad taste in their mouths. But they can play with the best in the world, they&#8217;ve proved it. Winning their first ever major tournament would be huge, and provide the confidence to make a run in next years World Cup.  I&#8217;m trying very hard not to get ahead of myself, but it is possible. Have they arrived? Guess we&#8217;ll find out on Sunday.</p>
<p>BTW, Sportscenter had a great line today.  Something about the Spanish streak running into &#8220;a red, white, and blue buzzsaw&#8221;. Epic.</p>
<address>***Matt is a freelance writer out of Tempe, AZ.  He enjoys musing about music, soccer, video games, and the soundtrack to FIFA 2009 for the X-Box 360.  Please feel free to leave a comment.</address>
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		<title>Guest Blogger &#8211; Erich Stauffer &#8211; The Tipping Point</title>
		<link>http://www.zacparsons.com/2009/04/guest-blogger-erich-stauffer-the-tipping-point/</link>
		<comments>http://www.zacparsons.com/2009/04/guest-blogger-erich-stauffer-the-tipping-point/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 11 Apr 2009 01:58:42 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Zac</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[butterfly effect]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[choices]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Erich Stauffer]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[guest blogger]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.zacparsons.com/?p=43</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I often wonder what like would be like if some of the big decisions I made in life were made differently.  Would I have married my wife? Gone to the same college? Bought that vehicle or that house? The more I think about it the more I realize that these huge decisions were not made [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I often wonder what like would be like if some of the big decisions I made in life were made differently.  Would I have married my wife? Gone to the same college? Bought that vehicle or that house? The more I think about it the more I realize that these huge decisions were not made at the moment they happened, but were the result of a series of events set off by the smallest of circumstances.</p>
<p>You may have heard the proverb about the butterfly flapping its wings in one part of the world causing dramatic weather in another part.  This is called the butterfly effect or the chaos theory (depending on which movie you are watching).  Taking that idea down to the micro level, we can use one butterfly wing flap in my life which changed the course of history for myself and all those around me.</p>
<p>I was in 6th grade and I was new.  My parents had just moved us from the suburbs of Indianapolis to the country just outside of Franklin.  I didn&#8217;t know anybody, but there was a girl that I liked.  Her name was Chrissy.  She rode my bus and everyone at school knew I liked her.  That&#8217;s why one day in social studies, a guy named Matt told me about his church.  He said I might like it because Chrissy went there.</p>
<p>Of course I wanted to go and I just might be able to convince my parents to take me.  We hadn&#8217;t found a new church yet and so my parents were willing to try it out.  That Sunday my whole family went to Fair Haven Christian Church not knowing it was so that I could spend more time with Chrissy.  They loved it.  I hated it.  We went to that church for the next eight years.</p>
<p><img class="alignright" title="Tipping Point" src="http://wakeupfreakout.org/tippingpointahead-sign-ready.png" alt="" width="200" height="233" />I eventually came around to loving the people at Fair Haven. I loved it so much I invited Jason to join.  Jason and I were on the swim team together.  He swam butterfly and I swam the breast stroke.  Jason plugged into the church fast and became quick friends with my other friends, Derek and Ben.  We did everything together, including going to Summer in the Son (SITS) at Kentucky Christian University (KCU).</p>
<p>It was at SITS that Jason, Derek, and I decided to go to KCU for college and it was at SITS that Jason and Krista, one of the other members of our youth group, started dating.  Within two years, Jason and Krista were married. Jason and Derek had transferred to Ball State and I went to Milligan College with Ben from Fair Haven.  When Derek lost his roommate to Krista, I left Milligan for Ball State in Muncie.  It was there that both Derek and I met our wives.</p>
<p>So how did I decide what school to go to or who to marry? By the time I got to that point, the tipping point, it was already decided.  The butterfly, Matt, had flapped his wings back in 1992 and because of that three families, nine children, and four friend&#8217;s lives were changed forever.  If you have any inclination that your life has no effect on other people, consider this.  Matt never talked to me again nor did he ever attend Fair Haven while I was there.  You have no idea what effect your words and your actions can have on another person&#8217;s life so make sure you use your tongue wisely.  Choose your words wisely for they hold the power of life and death.</p>
<address><em>***Erich Stauffer is an Indianapolis web designer  for <a href="http://www.telablue.com" target="_blank">Telablue, Inc.</a>, an Indianapolis web design  firm and promotion company serving the needs of individuals and businesses throughout the Midwest. He co-writes a blog with me at <a href="http://www.managingactions.com" target="_blank">ManagingActions.com</a> as well as on his own blog at <a href="http://www.erichstauffer.com" target="_blank">ErichStauffer.com</a>.</em></address>
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