But it has felt like there has been a theme developing…

I remember Sean Penn getting upset for the Academy Award for Best Actor award a few different times over the years, most notably for his role in I am Sam in 2001. I also remember that he finally won the award in 2008 for the film Milk, so I figured it was probably worth watching. It turns out that the movie is based the true story of the first openly homosexual elected official in the city of San Francisco in the 1970′s. The acting was nothing to get excited about, but I found myself really engaged in the story.

A film about the discrimination of homosexuals? Hmmmmm….

Sometime this summer, I caught part of an interview with Colin Firth on NPR’s Fresh Air mid-day program. It was the type of interview that has you sitting in your car for a few minutes after arriving at your destination, just waiting for something to break your interest free. He was speaking mostly of his motivation and experience in playing the title role in the 2009 film A Single Man. A couple of weeks ago, I decided to see this film for myself, my interest being piqued from the interview. While the cover of the film just shows Firth in the foreground, with a woman nuzzling his neck in the background, I didn’t know what to expect from the movie, other than this character being single, or (gulp) becoming single. This time, it turns out that Firth’s character is a closeted homosexual man, struggling in seeming solitude over the sudden death of his long time boyfriend.

A film about a homosexual man grieving the loss of his lover, with fear of judgement and persecution from society? Hmmmmm… Maybe there is a pattern forming here.

Penn and Teller have a controversial show on Showtime, designed to challenge and frustrate the status quo. They take many cherished and popular ideas and beliefs, examine them, and then finally pronounce them as B.S. One episode recently took the Boy Scouts of America to task for discriminating against homosexuals and atheists. The basic premise of their argument was not that discrimination was never acceptable, just that organizations that are government funded should not do so. It’s a fair point, and one that led me into a nice little debate on Facebook with some Christians who were appalled by President Obama’s choice to appear on the view instead of at the Boy Scouts’ 100th Anniversary Jamboree.

Christians wanting the President to support an organization that openly discriminates against homosexuals? Egads! The stars are beginning to align!

As I scoured the T.V. series shelves for the next season of Penn and Teller’s B.S., I came across an interestingly titled show called One Punk Under God. It’s a six episode reality show, documenting one eventful summer in the life of Jay Bakker, son of Jim and Tammy Faye Bakker. It was a pretty riveting series, with several intriguing and fascinating story lines. In keeping with the theme of my summer, Jay (who is a preacher at a church in Atlanta) is grappling with the issue of homosexuality and the Christian church. If he goes with his heart, and announces a complete acceptance of homosexuals into his church. None of this “love the sinner” language. We’re saying that homosexuality is not a sin. Jay’s apprehension of fallout and the actual fallout are worth the time it takes to watch this show. I highly recommend it. In fact…

God has told me that homosexuality is a beautiful form of love between two people and that the church needs to reconcile it’s beliefs to reflect this! All the signs point to this! It has to be true!

This was confirmed for me when a friend from bible college posted this video by America’s Best Christian, explaining the biblical view of marriage.

Click here to view the embedded video.

I shared it on my Tumblr feed, and it subsequently garnered 300 times more attention than my next highest tumbl. (Really? Neil Patrick Harris posting a self picture with a double rainbow gets no love? If you still don’t know about the double rainbow, click here. Whatever. I digress.) So what if that was only 300 notes? It was a big deal to me.

You know how sometimes it seems like fate/destiny/the universe/God is really trying to get your attention with something by bringing it in front of your face over and over and over again? It almost feels like some sort of invisible hand is trying to give you a “sign” that you are supposed to acknowledge? Well obviously I’ve been having some of that lately, and it all came to a head this week, with the revocation of Proposition 8 in California that had previously banned gay marriages.

Does all of this sound a little fishy?

This is the part where I confess.

I should admit that I don’t believe in these cosmic signs some sort of transcendent meaning. Well, I guess I do believe in the transcendent meaning part, except I believe it to be completely a psychological phenomenon based on the function of the reticular formation of the brain. We give things meaning, and then they seem to jump out of the bombardment of stimuli that we see, hear, and smell as we live our lives. We decide that something is important (even at a subconscious or barely conscious level), and we start to see it everywhere. We make all of this transcend everything else we experience.

If you give a crap about civil rights in general or homosexual rights in particular, your feelers start to tune in to anything and everything that could help to inform or fortify your opinion. At least, that’s what my summer has been filled with. Every summer needs a theme. This is mine. Love who you love, and I will support you.

This week, Interview with the Vampire author Anne Rice officially outed herself from Christianity. Naturally, she did so via her Facebook wall. Here is the text of her post:

“For those who care, and I understand if you don’t: Today I quit being a Christian … It’s simply impossible for me to ‘belong’ to this quarrelsome, hostile, disputatious, and deservedly infamous group. For ten years, I’ve tried. I’ve failed. I’m an outsider. My conscience will allow nothing else.”

Conscience? What exactly is it about Christianity that violates Rice’s conscience? Well, a few hours later, she posted this:

“As I said below, I quit being a Christian. I’m out. In the name of Christ, I refuse to be anti-gay. I refuse to be anti-feminist. I refuse to be anti-artificial birth control. I refuse to be anti-Democrat. I refuse to be anti-secular humanism. I refuse to be anti-science. I refuse to be anti-life. In the name of Christ, I quit Christianity and being Christian. Amen.”

Much like her return to the Roman Catholic church a decade ago, her stark about-face in regards to the church has stirred up a bit of discussion and opinion. Many wondered if she was mocking Christ and returning to her atheist beliefs of yesteryear. Again, via Facebook, Rice offered additional insight into her decision and her remaining devotion to the “Christ” of Christianity:

“My faith in Christ is central to my life. My conversion from a pessimistic atheist lost in a world I didn’t understand, to an optimistic believer in a universe created and sustained by a loving God is crucial to me. But following Christ does not mean following His followers. Christ is infinitely more important than Christianity and always will be, no matter what Christianity is, has been, or might become.”

A friend of mine on Facebook compared her comments to those of Ghandi, who famously repudiated Christians, while embracing much of the philosophy of Jesus. Other friends of mine cannot understand how one can embrace the teachings of Jesus without joining his followers as well.

It’s a pretty fascinating concept to wrestle with. Are you a Democrat if you support President Obama? Are you an anti-Semite if you support Mel Gibson? What if you happen to like Mel Gibson’s movies? Does appreciating Tom Cruise’s role in Interview with the Vampire mean that you need to embrace Scientology as well? And now we’re back to Anne Rice.

A local Christian church had a sermon series a few months back with the title “Fan or Follower”. It was designed to separated the sheep from the goats, and the faithful from the attenuated. The desire was to elicit a hardy response of  ”Follower!” to the not so rhetorical question of how one should respond to Jesus. It was very much a situation of “either you are for us, or you are against us”. It was a significant souring point on my own relationship with the church, which I discussed in a little more detail here.

So, Anne is a fan of Jesus, but does not want to follow him along with any fellow followers.

Sounds fair to me.

I can vividly remember the first time that I said “Goddamnit” in Matti’s basement, with my friend Ryan glaring at me in silent horror.  At the time, I felt shame and regret, but that didn’t stop me from arguing about the word’s relative evil or sinfulness compared to the others that we threw around as teenagers.  Most of the other swear words or put-downs that I employed in my youth didn’t seem to have much to do with the situation or people that I inflicted them on.  There wasn’t a real victim in my choice of language (other than my own vocabulary and the object of my malice, of course).  It wasn’t as if a proctologist would wince every time I said “a–hole” without regards for the literal definition of the word.

Not a lot has changed in my foul-language patterns since that time.  I’m not a saint, and my angry moments can still stir up the more colorful part of my tongue.

However, there is one word that has always given me pause.  It’s not just speaking it that bothers me, it’s hearing it as well.  In fact, it’s been almost 20 years since I used the r-word (retard) in a derogatory way.

Corky and the family from "Life Goes On"

I’m not sure why this word offended me so deeply, like the n-word.  I didn’t have a close friend or family member that was retarded or developmentally disabled in some way.  My closest relationship to anyone with a mental retardation was Corky from “Life Goes On“.  I don’t say that in jest.  I have always had an unusually close relationship with television characters.  I have kids named Kiefer and Evangeline.  I understand that it is a little odd, but it has always been an easy way for me to relate to the rest of humanity.

Nonetheless, when anyone would say the r-word, I would immediately imagine Corky standing next to me, turning to me, and asking the question: “Is that person saying that there is something wrong with me?”  This imaginary friend of mine helped me to keep my lips sealed from uttering the r-word in that context ever again.

During my sixth grade geography class yesterday, we somehow began a discussion about the r-word.  I asked the students if anyone had a family member who would be considered retarded.  A student raised his hand and shared some details about his uncle.  I explained my thoughts on the r-word and the lack of tolerance that would offered in my classes in regards to that word.

We talk about meaningful topics quite a bit, but this seemed different.  They were silent.  Pensive.  It was a powerful moment.  I could almost see the wheels turning in the minds of my students as they considered the potency of that word in their own vernacular.

Last night, I noticed that Sarah Palin has taken up a campaign against the usage of the r-word.  Although it may have started out as a political move to draw attention to White House Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel’s use of the r-word  in reference to liberal democrats, the point is well taken by Republicans and Democrats.  It brings to mind the uproar caused by President Obama on the Tonight Show last year, captured in this CNN.com article from spring of 2009.

Political motivation aside, I actually agree with and commend Mrs. Palin for her stand against this word.  Kudos and cool points to her on this.

In less than a month, on 03-03-10, an organization is gearing up to spread awareness about ridding the world of the r-word, or at least as it is all to commonly used right now.  This group is an offshoot of the Special Olympics.  Their website is www.r-word.org, and even features an “r-word counter”, where you can see how often your favorite websites have used the r-word (Disclaimer: www.zacparsons.com was proudly r-word free before the publishing of this article.).  There are resources of how to get involved in the quest to “Spread the word, to end the word”.

Of note, there is a video of John C. McGinley (Scrubs) giving a talk to a group of elementary school students about using the r-word.

Click here to view the embedded video.

I’ve stopped using the r-word for a long time now.  I’d be proud and encouraged if you chose to do the same.  What do you say?

Not all of the opposing opinions have been shared in a spirit of courtesy or love.  There have been more that couple blowhardy comments that do more to rouse the anger of those who disagree than to communicate some sore of salient argument.  In light of the fact that this is a prize to reward efforts towards peace, it is disappointing, to say the least.

The idea of world peace has been a frequent topic of conversation and contemplation in my life, as of late.  Emailing back and forth with a close friend, I was disappointed to learn that he believes world peace is not possible.  My view on this topic has been shaped recently by a documentary by Jeremy Gilley called “The Day After Peace”.  It juxtaposes the beliefs of those who believe in the possibility of world peace, and those who consider themselves “realists”.  You can view the short trailer for the film below.

Click here to view the embedded video.

I was referred to the video by a colleague from The Pacific Institute, where I am a consultant and facilitator.  You may want to add “Pollyanna” to that job description as well, as there are many people who agree with my friend about the inanity of believing in world peace.  Well, maybe that it too harsh of a way to put it, but there aren’t a lot of occasions where it is befitting to play the fool, as may be the case here.  If working towards world peace is one of them, then this sometime is my time.

Whether President Obama deserved the award or not may be irrelevant.  Peace will never be achieved while people are bullied or coerced into a certain belief or pattern of behavior.  Individual decisions to be agents of peace (six billion of them) will do immeasurably more than a prize given to our celebrity president (no intention of disrespect).

Maybe it’s best to ask the question, “Would you rather believe in world peace, and have your life embody that belief, or be someone who is realistic?”