Zac Parsons

An Associated Press story has said that Susan Boyle checked into a hospital today, suffering from exhaustion.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/eu_britain_boyle

She ended up finishing second in the “Britain’s Got Talent” competition, to a youth dance troupe with (not shockingly) a lot of talent.  Susan was considered the favorite going in, but did not win the final vote like so many thought that she would.  You can watch both of their performances below:

Susan seems to be a bit more cautious at the beginning.  There is a sense that the pressure of the spotlight has effected her some.  I’m glad that she is resting up in a hospital bed now, getting a much needed rest, before finding out what the next step of the journey is for her.

It seems there are very few people who can thrive under the pressure of the spotlight on them at all times, and not crack in some way.  Tom Cruise jumps makes presumptuous comments on postpartum depression and jumps on couches.  Brad Pitt has an affair.  Mel Gibson goes on a alcohol fueled rant against Jews.  I’ve even noticed this pattern on my own blog with my recent thoughts on Jonathan Brandis and Jon Gosselin.  Is this a result of the pressure of media scrutiny?  Is it an unfortunate side effect of success?  Or is is just what happens to each of us in our lives, just in varying degrees?

I’m going to lean towards the idea that it happens to all of us, just in varying degrees.  I have to wonder what I would do in such situations, and if I would even want such attention that I sometimes long for.  Last night, after working on editing a video for three hours, I closed my window without saving the project, and lost everything.  I felt like I could cry.  But, undeterred, I resiliently started over, not wanting the last three hours to have been in vain.  About 2 hours into this, I did it again.  Five hours gone, nothing to show for it, but a sad face and a desire to break something.  If there was a cameraman in my face, I’m sure that I would have not been able to appear “professional” for him or her.  I even snapped at my own mother, whom I asked for help, because she asked me the “wrong” question.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about why we (or myself) like certain people and not others.  Is it because of what they do, or who they are?  For good or bad, it seems to be both.  Susan Boyle, whoever you or whatever you do… enjoy your rest.

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Wow!   It seems very clear now that Susan’s dream has been a dream for quite a long time.  So she got knocked down a few times and things didn’t take off for her right away.  She kept hold of her dream and kept developing her skills.  The idea that “anything is possible” is poweful and important to cultivate in everyone, young and old.  But,  it should be remembered that large scale success can and often does take time, especially when developing specific skills are involved.

This really made me think about my own life and the personal changes that I have been going through lately.  Sometimes, things change so fast, you can look at yourself in the morning, and not even recognize who you are.  When I look in the mirror, I don’t see who I was, but I don’t quite see the man that I want to be either.  It’s a strange sort of in between place that I’m in now, wondering whether to turn back to some of my former habits or to keep growing and developing my new ones.  I believe that healthy self esteem is the essential starting point for self-directed growth and personal development.  But is there a point in that growth and development where you can lose your identity?

Surely Susan had some times in her life and sputtering career where she doubted and took some time wandering on different paths.  It’s very encouraging to me to see how she never gave up on what she was so clearly passionate about.  It’s a great gift to be able to change our mind.  It’s also great to see the potential of a long held hope come to blossom at last.  Cheers again to Susan for her to get out there with her frumpy dress and keep her dream alive.  May we all be as successful as her someday!  What perseverance!

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As I watched this clip for the fourth time today, I still got goosebumps.  I even welled up a bit and may have dropped a few tears.  There is something so universally beautiful about this.  The humble confidence in her comment: “I’m gonna make that audience rock!”  The ache in my heart about her never being kissed in her 47 years.  Her regained composure after momentarily blanking out at Simon’s question.  The crescendo approval and applause that bubbled forth from the audience.  I loved all of it.

She mentioned how she always wanted to perform in front of a large audience.  Perhaps we have heard others say this, and we have labeled them as self-centered or egotistical.  But with Susan, I feel a tremendous sense of healthy pride that she is good enough and able to do such a thing.  It is what she has rehearsed in her mind over and over again, creating an extremely vivid picture for her.  One that is full of emotion.

It’s fantastic (to use her word) to vicariously experience her triumph over a judgemental world (and audience).  Al Bandura talks about how we go through our successes to quickly and too lightly.  Here’s to hoping that she spends plenty of time reveling in the joy that she gives to others with her performance and her personality.

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